And yet... Somehow wise...

I love quotes. I absolutely adore them. I decided I'd share a few, if you promise not to cry out of joy. Which is what I would do if someone opened up and presented me with a multitude of goodness. 


The first symptom of love in a young man is shyness; the first symptom in a woman, it's boldness. - Victor Hugo

Sanity is a madness put to good use  - George Santayana

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come - Matt Groening

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. - Will Rogers

There are two ways to pass a hurdle: leaping over or plowing through... There needs to be a monster truck option.- Jeph Jacques

I hate women because they always know where things are. - James Thurber

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy and Jill a rich widow - Evan Esar

No human thing is of serious importance. - Plato

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. - Jackie Mason

They always talk who never think. - Matthew Prior

If you're choking in a restaurant you can just say the magic words, 'Heimlich maneuver,' and all will be well. Trouble is, it's difficult to say 'Heimlich maneuver' when you're choking to death. - Eddie Izzard

The reason there is so little crime in Germany is that it's against the law. - Alex Levin

Rock and roll is the hamburger that ate the world. - Peter York

When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. - Eric Hoffer

Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip. - Will Rogers

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

The time not to become a father is eighteen years before a war. - E. B. White

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. - Thomas A. Edison

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert. - Demetri Martin

Dating is just awkward moments and one person wants more than the other. It's just that constant strangeness. I think it's a very real thing. - Jason Schwartzman


Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. - Maryon Pearson


Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. - Douglas Adams


Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin


I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them. - George Bush


I think that's all for now folks. If I think of any more, I'll put them up on another post. Peace off! 


P.S. Yes, I realize these aren't evenly spaced. I had no choice in the matter. Sorry guys. Get over it.